McKensie's Story for Endometriosis Awareness Month
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MCKensie with Emmy and Elle shortly after they came home from the NICU
We call her the, "baby whisperer"
We all have that one friend who you just know is going to be an amazing mother. I know I do. Her name is McKensie Moody Kanos and we met our freshman year of college. She is the epitome of a Mother Hen. She was a kindergarten teacher and now a nanny for three precious girls. She is the friend who all the mother's gladly hand over their babies to because they know they are in safe hands. She takes joy in taking care of others. I will never forget senior year of college when she came to the sorority house to take care of me while I had the stomach flu. She was armed with fluids, meds, and her pup Saylor to cheer me up. Not many college kids would forfeit a Friday night to tend to a sick friend but she did so with love in her heart and was the next best thing from having my own mom there to help. Fast forward to when the girls were born and she was one of the first people to come visit me in the hospital and to meet the girls in the NICU. I remember she made me so happy about how excited she was to watch me change their tiny diapers and always checked in for daily updates. We both live by and love the saying, "never stop being a good person because of bad people," because we know that kindness really does make the world go 'round.
McKensie is one to always ask, "how can I help?" and mean it. So, I was not at all surprised when her response was, "I did not even need to read your entire text. Of course!" when I reached out to see if she would be willing to open up and share her fight with Endometriosis in honor of March being Endometriosis Awareness Month. Our hope is by her sharing her story she might help other women facing the same disease and infertility. You are not alone. As women, we should all support each other and I am so proud to feature McKensie on overwhelmed because she is facing a diagnosis that is extremely overwhelming but doing so with an amazing amount of grace and strength.
After reading her candid essay, please feel free to reach out to McKensie, via instagram, if you have any questions or want to connect with a fellow Endometriosis warrior. Thank you for reading.
She is a natural
Hey ya’ll! My name is McKensie Moody Kanos and I live in Charlotte with my husband, Chrys and two fur babes, Sallie and Saylor! I am so excited Jessica (aka Emmy and Elle’s mom) asked me to write a post for her blog. First of all, I love spreading awareness for causes that mean a great deal to me and second of all, Jess is one of my best friends, so I would do anything for her. It is Endometriosis Awareness Month and I am here to share my story. I hope by sharing it will either educate someone on the topic or help someone speak up about their own story, whether it has to do with endometriosis or not.
Alright, so let’s get started… Raise your hand if you are one to google all the things the minute you get sick and try to self-diagnose you ailment? I’m currently sitting here, raising both hands (with a glass of wine in one of them, obviously). Rewind to about 10-12 years ago, when I did some major googling on some symptoms I was having, and diagnosed myself with endometriosis. At the time of my self-diagnosis, I could not tell you what endometriosis actually was, but I could tell you the symptoms. I was sure as hell experiencing all of them. I would have horrible, and I mean HORRIBLE, period cramps. They were so bad that I couldn’t stand, walk, get dressed etc. Some of the other symptoms included painful bowel movements (#sorrynotsorry if you are a dude and happened upon this post), the heaviest periods you could imagine, and the list goes on. I eventually discovered what Endometriosis actually was, but didn’t fully understand it until most recently. It is a condition where the tissue, similar to the tissue of the uterine lining, is found somewhere else in the body.
I decided it was time to confirm this diagnosis with someone who actually has a degree (sorry Dr. Google), so I made an appointment with my OBGYN. After a conversation and an ultrasound, she told me that she didn’t think I had endometriosis and that I should lay off the gluten. UM WHAT? There is no way gluten only affects me during certain points of my cycle, because I was eating gluten all the time. She assured me that she didn’t think I had endometriosis, and the only way to be 100% sure was to have surgery, but to, “try the gluten thing.”
I was in my very early 20’s at the time and thought, “Oh, hell no!” I’m sure at the time, Spring Break or a Sorority/Fraternity Formal was way more important, so I was not going to let surgery slow me down. I also tried the whole non-gluten thing, but that was before there were a lot of gluten free options, so I slowly gave up on that. It never helped either, but in all fairness, I didn’t give it a fair shot. Life went on, I lived on Advil/Tylenol for those days that felt like I was dying and kept eating gluten. Now that I look back, I should have left that doctor right away to search for a second opinion. But I was young, dumb, and wasn’t thinking too much about my reproductive organs during that stage in life. However, there was a 12-year delay of my diagnosis of this condition, because of the only way to be 100% sure, is surgery but also because people just are not educated enough on the subject.
Fast forward to my first year of marriage. My husband and I knew we wanted kids and we didn’t want to waste much time, so we started trying right away. Now, in the back of my mind, for some reason, I knew that I was going to have trouble getting pregnant. I tried to not let the negative thoughts get me down. The first month went by, the second, third and so on, and we weren’t pregnant yet. “Alright, no biggie,” I thought to myself. I decided to schedule an appointment with my OBGYN to have the preconception talk and make sure we are doing everything right. This is the same OBGYN from years ago. Long story short, she basically told me I was an idiot for coming to see her so soon after just getting married and we should be enjoying our first year of marriage, rather than focusing on trying to have a kid! I obviously left her office furious and crying. I’m a nanny, for crying out loud. I went to school for elementary education, my friends hand their kids to me when they need some baby whispering. I knew damn well I wanted kids and did not want to waste another minute! I’m still bitter about that visit…if you can’t tell.
Anyways, I called my sister-in-law the same day. She is a Nurse Practictioner. I asked for a list of new providers and by the end of the day I had an appointment with a new doctor and a new practice. I saw her two weeks later and we came up with a plan that if I wasn’t pregnant in six months to come back in and we would do all the tests. Fast forward to six months in, with the most painful periods ever, we were back in her office. We went through all the tests, for both me and my husband, and everything was coming back normal. I was diagnosed with unexplained infertility. Great…I cannot get pregnant and we don’t know why.
At this time, she felt it was necessary to see a specialist, so she referred me to Carolina’s Fertility Institute. At my first appointment with CFI, my doctor did an ultrasound and immediately said, “I think you have endometriosis but I can’t be 100% positive.” I came back with, “what the hell, that’s the first thing you see, how come the other doctors couldn’t tell me that?” He assured me that the ultrasound technicians were usually ordered by the doctors to go in and look for one particular thing. The ultrasound techs were not given the chance to freely explore as to why I couldn’t get pregnant, and that it is his job, every day, to help people get pregnant. That made me feel better. I immediately knew this dude was the real deal and that he was going to be a huge factor in us getting pregnant.
He knew we were motivated and didn’t want to waste too much time, so he suggested a round or two of IUI (artificial insemination) assisted with drugs to help the process. If we weren’t pregnant then, we would reevaluate. We did the first (and only) round of IUI in November. I had been on a drug called Letrozole for two months (it is similar to Clomid, but he didn’t want me using Clomid because it would assist in the growth of endometriosis, if I had it). My husband and I waited the dreadful 2.5 weeks to test if we were pregnant. Of course I just had to be late this month, and on Thanksgiving day, I started one of the most painful (and emotionally draining) periods I ever had.
I text my doctor and he said, “okay, no worries we will try again next month.” On day 12 of that cycle, I am back in his office for my ultrasound to make sure I am about to ovulate, when he tells me he can’t even find my right ovary, my uterus is fixed, and he can definitely see endometrial tissue! He strongly suggested we opt out of the second IUI, as it only had a 1 percent chance of success at this rate, and that we go ahead and schedule the surgery. The Letrozole I had taken, in hopes of helping us get pregnant, sent my endometriosis in a tizzy and it had gotten BAD. We also found out that by me stopping birth control (before we were married) it also increased the rate of the tissue growth.
It was in December that I found out I was going to have to have surgery, but they couldn’t get me in until the end of January. I was a little upset at first that we would have to wait even longer, but it was actually a blessing in disguise. I was able to enjoy the holidays without stressing over the baby making process and all the problems that came along with it for us.
Fast forward to today and I am almost a month out from surgery and feeling amazing. They removed a lot of tissue and cleaned me up really well. My recovery was a breeze. I know some women might fault me for that, but I really had no issues. Maybe it was God’s way of giving me a little bit of a break. The baby making is still on hold because I am still recovering internally. Ironically, I am back on birth control, so the endometriosis doesn’t flare back up while I am recovering. It is quite nice to skip cycles and not even have to deal with it right now. Our hopes (me, my husbands, and our doctor) is that once I’m fully recovered, we start the whole IVF process in May.
Snuggles from Sallie post-surgery
Enjoying cupcakes made by our baby friends, Nora and Macie, as a post-surgery get well treat from Emmy and Elle's birthday party
Unfortunately, the surgery doesn’t “cure” you of endometriosis. BUT it does eliminate the pain that goes a long with it for the time being. I am fortunate enough that I have only had to have this surgery once so far, but people like Julianne Hough have had to have it twice. The biggest thing I learned throughout this whole process, even dating back to 12 years ago, was to be an advocate for yourself when you go and see your doctor. Tell them your symptoms, demand for tests, results, etc. If they won’t give it to you then go somewhere else. With my second doctor and the specialist, I was very clear on my expectations, symptoms, what I wanted out of each appointment and I left each time feeling confident about the next step, regardless, of what that next step might be.
I hope my story can help someone, whether they have endometriosis or not. If you are the praying kind, lift your hands up for us as we continue this journey of bringing a little babe home. Thank you for reading!
Websites for more information about Endometriosis:
medicinenet.com/endometriosis/article
mayoclinic.org/diseases-conditions/endometriosis/symptoms-causes
